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This site is dedicated to the Swinging Lifestyle in New England. Life is short and sex is fun! Having to work Monday through Friday at your 40+ hour a week job is a drag! By the time the weekend comes around you have earned a little excitement. If you are a church goer, it gives Jesus one hell of a story on Sunday morning while you bless yourself and blush.
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Wednesday, July 17, 2019

Squirting 101


‘Squirting’ is synonymous with female ejaculation, and has been the subject of much scrutiny and controversy in sexology for many years now. This is, of course, despite being nothing new to women. Female ejaculation has been noted in history dating back to 300 BC in the writings of Aristotle and Hippocrates. In ancient Asia, female ejaculation was common and therefore mentioned in many Chinese Taoist texts; and is thought to have been included in the Kama Sutra, an ancient Indian Hindu text. Yet Somehow, some people lose their minds when it comes to squirting and its validity today. So what is the big deal anyway? 

What is Squirting?

It’s easy to understand when a male ejaculates because semen is visually and physiologically dissimilar to any other bodily fluid, male or female. However, because female ejaculate varies vastly in volume and consistency, and that it departs from the same exit as urine, it’s vulnerable to being relegated to an urban legend.

For women, the urge to urinate can come on during sex depending on how aroused she is, what stimulation is being used, and what erogenous zone is triggered. This urge is typically attributed to arousing the G-spot (named after German gynecologist Ernst Gräfenberg: a man that disappeared one day and was never found again... If you're keeping score that an inside joke. Ha! Get it? INSIDE joke... Ahem, I digress), but it can send a woman into a panic from fear of embarrassing herself.

However, this is a perfectly normal sensation, and it doesn’t usually mean that you’re going to urinate. The G-spot is exactly what needs to be aroused for optimal ejaculation. There is even speculation of an anterior fornix erogenous zone (A-zone) on the anterior (front) wall of the vagina above the cervix, which when stimulated can produce rapid lubrication and arousal.

There are glands located around the lower end of the female urethra called Skene glands, after Scottish gynecologist Alexander Skene, which contribute to female ejaculation. These glands are thought of as the ‘female prostate,’ and the tissue surrounding the area becomes engorged with blood during arousal. Upon sufficient arousal and orgasm, the Skene glands fill up and can ejaculate a varying amount of fluid. This fluid’s flow can range from a slight drip to that of a firehose. It is mostly clear and slightly milky, and has only a faint smell and taste.
Studies have indicated that the ejaculate also carries an enzyme called prostatic-specific antigen (PSA), which is something commonly found in male ejaculate that is produced by the prostate. Researchers believe that PSA in female ejaculate comes from the Skene glands, and it appears that some women have reduced glands or none at all – which accounts for why some women are able to squirt and some aren’t.
What Isn’t Squirting?
Squirting is not fictitious, nor is it disgusting or abnormal. It is often described as female incontinence by those who don’t know any better, which is incredibly insulting. Some women can restrain the expulsion while some are unable to stop it, but it is not the result of a disorder or abnormality. Above all, IT IS NOT PEE, and anyone who has ever been in the same room as it will tell you the same.
How I Learned to Squirt:
After years of ogling it in porn, I became fascinated with squirting and had to figure out how to do it. Being the scientist that I am, I researched what I could about female ejaculation prior to the event for any tips on how to proceed. The consensus was to arouse the G-spot and spend ample time on stimulation. So I got plenty of towels under me, used the recommended Njoy Pure Wand and Magic Wand and released as many inhibitions as I could while waiting anxiously for the result as I came. I orgasmed a few times, and instead of giving in to the instinct to ‘hold everything in,’ I tried pushing out. But absolutely nothing was on the towels except for a tiny drip that ran down the swell of my ass. Squirting always seemed very ‘magical’ to me so I only had partial confidence going into it, and when it didn’t work the first time I was discouraged.

Upon reflection, I realized that I simply wasn’t comfortable. How can anyone focus on an explosive orgasm whilst lying upon a mound of towels, yet still worrying about destroying the mattress? Irritated at the thought of taking my roadshow to the bathtub, I discovered fluid-proof sheets and my world changed completely. I also decided that everything is more fun with a friend so my husband and I teamed up to attempt squirting one more time.
With a pillow under my ass to have better access to my G-spot, he slowly started warming me up in order to arouse the Skene glands and we used the same two toys as before. He knelt between my legs facing me as he massaged my G-spot with the Pure Wand while I vibrated my clit. Compared to the first time that I tried squirting, I was much more at ease with the situation because I wasn’t worried about damaging anything, and most of all – I didn’t feel like Little Miss Muffet lying on a pile of junk.
As I started feeling close to orgasm I focused my thoughts on relaxing, and as soon as I crossed the threshold to orgasm, I pushed hard with my vaginal muscles and came so hard that I started screaming. My husband suddenly started excitedly exclaiming things like, “Oh fuck YES, oh my, this is SO FUCKING HOT!” and I realized – it was happening. I did it. I fucking drenched him, and I’ve never cum so hard in my life. The fluid was clear and slightly milky in parts, with no smell whatsoever. I then went to the bathroom and urinated a full bladder, so I know what I squirted was ejaculate. I immediately felt like a badass.

What’s It Like to Squirt?
Squirting orgasms are obviously a bit different from ‘standard’ orgasms. Many women find them to be incredibly intense, longer-lasting, and more satisfying. They may take more time and effort to achieve, and certainly more focus is required at first until you’re more experienced. Sometimes you don’t realize you’re squirting except for the intense heat from the liquid on your ass; and other times inhuman and barbaric sounds escape your lips from how powerful the orgasm is. It sort of feels like a water balloon exploding as it bounces around a room. It really is the ultimate release.
It sort of feels like a water balloon exploding as it bounces around a room.

Who Can Squirt?

It’s important not to generalize and to remember that not everyone who is female can squirt, and not everyone who can squirt is female. In a perfect world, every identifying female would be able to squirt on demand if desired, but we know that isn’t the case. Since very little is known about the Skene glands and how exactly cis females ejaculate, it’s difficult to curate a checklist for the Perfect Squirting Candidate. My best advice: keep trying until it works because a great orgasm every time is an excellent consolation prize in my book.

If You Can’t, Are You Broken?

No, of course not, you are absolutely not broken! Some women may be unable to squirt due to one physical limitation or another; but that isn’t always the case – some women just don’t know how. With the amount of discouragement and censorship (such as the UK banning female ejaculation in porn in 2014), it’s not hard to believe that women aren’t getting the information and support that they need to experiment with and nurture their own gift. Though I strongly urge you; if you do know what to do and it still hasn’t happened, do not give up! Sometimes it can take several tries depending on the circumstances, your frame of mind, and the tools you may be using.

Want to Squirt Like a Porn Star? Here’s How to Get Started:

Everyone is different, but a good place to start is with your favorite G-spot stimulating toy or partner. Careful stimulation and arousal of the G-spot (2-3 inches up the anterior vaginal wall between the vaginal opening and urethra; rough patch of tissue) should begin to fill the Skene glands with fluid as the body becomes more excited. A partner can reach better than you, but a well-crafted toy can also do the trick. Toys that are curved with a bulbous head are bound to ‘hit the spot.’ The more stimulation that occurs for the G-spot and A-zone, the better the chances of ejaculating. It’s also possible to ejaculate from strictly clitoral stimulation as well.


When you feel the moment upon you, try your best to clear your mind, free yourself, and literally let go. If nothing happens right away, don’t be afraid to push with your pelvic floor muscles to stimulate ejaculation. It may just be a trickle, or it may shoot clear across the room; be prepared for anything! No one way works the same for everyone; so don’t be afraid to experiment and you’ll be gushing with joy in no time.

Above all, enjoy yourself!


by Ophelia

Tuesday, July 16, 2019

Fun with the Clitoris

When it comes to sexual pleasure, there is no magic button or one-size-fits-all technique guaranteed to produce mind-blowing orgasms. However, by developing a deeper understanding of the anatomical structures involved in sexual pleasure and learning innovative techniques, your chances of thrilling your lover with orgasmic delight multiply exponentially!

When it comes to sexual pleasure, there is no magic button or one-size-fits-all technique guaranteed to produce mind-blowing orgasms. However, by developing a deeper understanding of the anatomical structures involved in sexual pleasure and learning innovative techniques, your chances of thrilling your lover with orgasmic delight multiply exponentially!

The clitoris, in recent history, has been sorely misunderstood. Often reduced to a “pea-sized bump” at the top of where the lips meet, it’s no surprise that many of us are unaware of its true pleasure potential.

More than a tiny nodule rich in nerve endings, the clitoral complex is comprised of many parts — both on the outside and inside of the body. It has two legs, two bulbs, foreskin, glands, nerves, blood vessels, a shaft and it gets raging erections. That’s right — during arousal, blood flow causes clitoral boners!
You may be thinking that the lovely clitoris sounds an awful lot like the penis and if so, you’re on the right track. The clitoris and the penis share a great deal in common with regard to both origin, structure and function:

The head of the clitoris (also called the glans) is highly sensitive to touch and is covered/protected by the clitoral hood (AKA foreskin). The shaft, which is composed of erectile tissue and cavernous bodies that fill with blood, is attached to the head beneath the hood. The inner legs and bulbs lie underneath the vulva next to the vaginal canal. These areas also expand with pleasure when aroused causing the outer lips to swell and create a tight sensation which early researchers referred to as the orgasmic platform.
Sometimes it can be difficult to visually locate the clitoris — especially if you’re looking for the head, which often “hides” beneath the hood. If you pull up very gently on the skin at the top of your inner labia (just below the pubic mound), you’ll reveal the sensitive (sometimes shiny) pearl-like structure. Each person’s body is unique, so even if you can’t see it, rest assured that it’s there right at the top of the where the lips meet.
Understanding the structure of the clitoris helps to explain why so many women achieve pleasure and orgasm from rubbing, grinding and stroking on the outside of their bodies — from the pubic mound down to the base of the vulva. When you rub the outside, you have the potential to stimulate the entire clitoral complex – from the head to the inner bulbs.


Obviously each clitoris is unique. However, here are a few guidelines for exploring the clit:

  • Start slowly and gently using your breath and feather-light touch. You don’t have to dive right in with fingering, vibrating and sucking.
  • Tease the areas around the clitoris (e.g. inner thighs) to build anticipation.
  • Don’t ring it like a doorbell unless she asks you to. It’s not an elevator button.
  • Pay attention to the entire clitoris — not just the head.
  • Use lube! Please and thanks.
If you’re looking to take your clitoral pleasure game to the next level, try some of the techniques below to discover new pathways to pleasure. And remember to ask your lover for feedback, as she is the ultimate expert in her own sexual pleasure.


The Pussy Pocket

This is one of my favorite techniques as it allows you to cup the entire vulva and really envelop the clitoris. As you gently grind against the pubic mound, you stroke the inner shaft of the clitoris through the hood — like a mini hand-job! And the pressure against her lips allows you to stimulate the inner bulbs as you grind, press and pulse.
  • Place the palm of your hand on her pubic mound (the fleshy patch at the very bottom of the abdomen).
  • Fold your fingers over her vulva to cover her lips.
  • Gently increase the pressure.
  • Pulse, grind or rub with gradually increasing intensity; be very gently at first and follow the rhythm and pressure of her hips as guidance.
  • Use a little lube for added pleasure.

The Cross My Heart

This technique is perfect for stimulating the clitoral head and bulbs as well as the fourchette – the sensitive spot where the lips meet at the very bottom of the vulva.
  • Apply lube to your thumbs and press them both gently against the top of the vulva over the head (or hood) of the clitoris.
  • Sensually slide your thumbs around the outer edge of the lips as though you’re drawing a heart around the entire vulva; pay a little extra attention to the “fork in the road” at the bottom where the lips meet — this is the sensitive.

The W

This sensual move allows you to grind against the inner bulbs and legs while simultaneously caressing the hood, head and shaft of the clitoris.
  • Slather the palm of your hand in lube.
  • Press your hand against her vulva as you separate your fingers to form a “W” shape.
  • As you slide up and down (s-l-o-w-l-y), open and close your fingers to close and widen the “W”
  • If you have trouble opening your fingers into a “W”, try a “V” or a simply high five formation as you separate and bring your fingers back together.

The Tongue Stroke

 Give the head of the clitoris pinpointed pleasure by alternating movements with your tongue.
  • Gently pull back on the hood of the clitoris to reveal the head.
  • Lick your lips and breathe (don’t blow!) light, warm air over the head.
  • Alternate between rolling the tip of your tongue around the head and sweeping your whole tongue over it as though you’re nodding your head back and forth to say “no”.

The Multi-tasker

This move may sound complicated, but it actually takes very little effort:
  • Lube it up!
  • Slide your entire thumbs up and down the outer sides of her vulva while you slide your tongue up and down the middle (moving in opposite directions).
  • Pay a little extra attention to the head of the clit at the top and feel free to slip your tongue inside should you feel so inclined.

All Roads Lead To Orgasm

The inner parts of the clitoris surround the vaginal canal, so you can stimulate the clitoris from inside of the vagina too!
  • Slide two fingers inside of the vagina inserting as slowly as you possibly can to build anticipation and intensity.
  • Rotate your hand from your wrist so she feels the tingly sensations (don’t make a scooping motion with your fingers — just rotate) while simultaneously pulsing one finger from your other hand against the head of her clitoris on the outside.

The Sweet Pinch

This technique stimulates the G-Spot (considered part of the clitoral complex by some researchers) and the shaft, hood and head of the clitoris simultaneously.
  • Slide your index and middle fingers inside of her vagina with your wrist rotated upwards. You may be able to feel the G-Spot (it’s really an area — not a distinct spot) on the upper wall.
  • “Pinch” as you use your thumb to stroke against the hood of the clit on the outside.

The Flat Pulse

This one is simple! Press your entire tongue over her vulva and pulse it with increasing intensity to press against the inner and outer parts of the clitoris. Follow the rhythm of her hips to fall in synch as she rides against you.

The Vibe

As her arousal increases, she may enjoy direct stimulation of the clitoral head. If this is the case, roll a small vibe (like the We-Vibe Tango) around this sensitive spot and encourage her to guide your hand in the process.
She may also enjoy squeezing a thicker vibrator between her legs to stimulate the inner clitoris via her labia.


Finally, have fun, keep an open mind, don't be afraid to get your face wet and by all means tell us how it worked out! 



- By: Dr. Jess O'Reilly